I'm here. Baby is not...yet.
I've had lots of fun things I've planned on posting for you, but well, it just didn't happen...yet.
In the past week, I've found myself turning inward and going to my soul's quiet place instead of writing and sharing with the world. While there is still plenty on my "to-do" wish list before little brother comes, most of the things that really matter are done. The rest is just fluff and some of that extra nesting we mother hens tend to do. Instead, I've heard a whisper in my soul to slow down, clear my head of the static, and focus on the task at hand...and I've listened.
Just me, my thoughts, and the Lord....asking Him to fill me up. To give me strength and clarity when I need it most. To calm this anxious woman.
I think a lot of us get so caught up in all of the physical preparations for welcoming a new baby, that we often forget that there is work to do mentally, as well. I know this was the case with my first pregnancy...and I had the postpartum depression to prove it. This time, though, I find myself worrying more on the condition of my heart and mental state because that is what will really make this family transition easier...not how many boxes of diapers I have or if a nursery is decorated.
I've been working through my expectations and reminding myself that even on my best days, they are too high. Add a newborn to the mix, and well, the bar really must be lowered. I've been giving myself permission to break my own rules and have no expectations...easier said than done. Because really, if I have an expectation set in place, I'm setting myself up for disappointment and self-loathing. Not healthy.
I've been filling myself up with God's Word and promises for me. Reminding myself that He came to bring me peace. He is my comforter. He is my rock and my refuge.
So there you have it, the quiet before the labor and the reason behind it. Hopefully, I'll have cute baby pictures to share soon. We covet your prayers, dear friends.
martha brady
Thursday 25th of August 2011
will be praying for you as you wait. i'm guessing you had some time to start learning to live w lower expectations after those months of nausea. glad you got some months to "catch up" b/f baby arrived. praying for the safe arrival of asher. i won't tell you not to worry. i will tell you that whatever happens, God is in control and He is faithful. Whatever He brings into your life will be in your best interest. Most likely that will include a safe, healthy delivery! Blessings on all of you!
Kara @ The Chuppies
Thursday 25th of August 2011
Came over to check on you... Appreciate hearing your heart-mind-prep-processing...will remember to pray for the transition every time I think of the "Happy Brown House".
Dawn
Tuesday 23rd of August 2011
thinking of you and can't wait to hear your news! best wishes!!!
Sara
Thursday 25th of August 2011
Thank you Dawn! Hopefully it will be soon!
Sistergirl
Tuesday 23rd of August 2011
Stop worrying. Trust in the Lord, he will make sure you have everything you need. Everything will go well with the baby. Love is all the need, :)
Sara
Thursday 25th of August 2011
I know, I know....resisting the urge to worry is so hard sometimes.
Faith
Monday 22nd of August 2011
You are a wise woman! Praying for you !
Sara
Thursday 25th of August 2011
Thank you for the prayers, Faith!